The Wit and Wisdom of Don Freakin Garber.

Yeah, I know. We're supposed to be over the whole Deucebag thing. But Garber is going to be walking the streets of our fair city next year, and THIS is his justification for the most questionable sports management this side of FIFA or perhaps Boxing?

I want to love MLS. Then this guy opens his mouth. Thanks to John Nyen of the TA for following up. You got our answer, which was basically "it's the golden rule: I make the gold, and I write the rules. Thanks for your support."

What follows comes complements of my original hometown's fishwrap, who cover all sports including MLS (yes, Oregonain, I'm talking to you.)

You can read the entire article here:

YPerhaps the best question of the afternoon - and the best answer, too - dealt with MLS' renowned lack of transparency. John Nyen, a member of Portland's Timbers Army supporters club, asked Garber about the league's repeated pattern of disclosing new methods of player acquisition after the fact. Some of those methods - including the so-called "Impact Designated Player" - are not explained anywhere in MLS' official roster rules.

Nyen quite bluntly asked Garber when the league would stop doing so much behind the scenes, and bring more of their affairs into public view.

"It's a good question," Garber said, "and I appreciate you asking it the way you did."

So did we all.

Garber went on to respond:

In the past, we had a lot of rules that were put in place because we needed to have the league succeed. Some of them were things that we believed were the right competitive moves. We would never do anything that would place one team at a competitive advantage over another. But it just wasn't something that was part of our DNA, to open up from a transparency perspective, all of the rules from the league.

We're in the process of doing that. The mechanism that got Clint Dempsey should have been exposed, or promoted, prior to - as opposed to afterwards. Because we weren't trying to hide anything. So I think you'll see going forward that we will have more transparency in our rules.

[As a reminder, MLS paid a big chunk of the transfer fee to bring Dempsey to the Seattle Sounders from Tottenham Hotspur.]

What I will say is that as an emerging league, there are times when we are figuring out those rules as we go along.

So if - and I don't know that the Clint Dempsey case is an example of that - there could be something that comes up where we say: this is something that we need to figure out now, because we will lose this player or we won't be able to sign this player, or it would prevent us from being competitive in an international competition, or whatever it might be.

And that means that as an emerging league, we've got to have the ability to be flexible and evolve.

I will say that there is an emergence from our complex system that has almost a culture of people who are beginning to be experts in it. Like they are in the NFL, where they are called "capologists." The NFL system is very, very complicated. Not every fan knows it. And there are 32 "capologists" who really know it.

We had our first "capologist," Tim Bezbatchenko, leave the league office - he was one of the guys behind the curtain who knew all these rules - and he was just hired by Toronto FC to help them navigate it better.

So the best way I can answer it is: there's no insidious plan, there's no desire to hide behind any artificial system. There will be more transparency going forward, but we have to accept - and we ask our fans to accept - that at 18 years old, we are still evolving, and we are still doing some of this stuff on the fly. That's the best way I can answer it, very openly.


Alright guys, I don't believe I have to say this but, just in case, please do not submit anything racist, homophobic, sexist or otherwise not appropriate for even the younger Timbers fans.

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